Hot off the fashion beat: Are you tired of wearing old tee-shirts from your 2000 vacation at Daytona Beach? Do those jeans that you bought ten years ago…look like something Don Imus would wear to a barbecue? Do you have to jump up and down and yell “HEY, SOMEBODY WANT TO HELP ME? ” when you walk into Neiman’s? Is it getting hard to compete with all those fifteen year olds who wander the streets in bikini tops?
Do you JUST need a change? Now that you have figured out you might never have the money for a boob job, what other remedies can you possibly go for to get that important rush of “wow” look at HER, that you need …ladies?
Well, I’m here to help. Here’s some really great fashions, just come in from Italy. All genius. One for a rainy day, one to wear as a hint that “Honey, it’s Valentine’s Day.” and you really need a present, and the third…shows you how hard at work our scientists are at inventing the best breast that money can’t buy.
The accesories, are also…very important. If it’s going to rain, you definitely need cool looking sunglasses. I suggest wearing the banana shoes with any of these fine creations, because WHEN you fall over, and you will, you can actually say, “Oh…I slipped on a banana peel!” Oh..my! Lady GAGA, eat your heart out.